Church has sort of fallen out of fashion lately. It seems that the teenage whine of yore, “But mommm, it just isn’t cool” has migrated into the mindset of our current generation of parents. Or perhaps, more likely, the teenagers of yore have grown up to become today’s parents, holding steadfast to their claim that church just isn’t cool. And maybe it isn’t. I was never one to be on top of the trends, so I’m not even going to try to convince you that church is en vogue. But what I will do is give you the reasons why my family does attend church.
First, though, I’ll explain that where we attend is technically not a church. Our board and leadership recently voted to officially change our description to “spiritual community” rather than church. This is part semantics (the new terminology better reflects who we are) and part marketing (probably due to the aforementioned resistance to anything church-y). But really, church, schmurch… every Sunday my husband, children and I go to a building where adults sit and listen to someone speak about matters of the spirit and children attend small groups where they do hands-on activities to help them explore matters of the spirit. Whatever you choose to call it, this is our reasoning for doing it:
1. Employment: It’s true… probably the number one reason that we find the motivation to get everyone in the family up and dressed and out the door on a Sunday morning is because it helps us pay the bills. I work at Unity on the North Shore, where we attend Sunday services. However, nowhere in my job description does it state that I am required to bring along a life partner, a toddler and a baby. Sure, bringing my kids to work might sound like a perk, but in reality it’s a struggle. I have to balance getting my work done with caring for my children. Mike really carries the parenting load for us on Sunday mornings, but while I’m running around setting up classrooms and answer questions, inevitably the baby will see me and cry to nurse, and the toddler will start screaming “mommy, mommy, look what I made.” Ignoring the kiddos would be cruel, so we’ve learned to get to Unity extra-early so that I can get my tasks completed and still have time to take mommy-breaks. And I multi-task: more than once I’ve made announcements from the pulpit while wearing a baby in a sling. A lot of weeks Mike and I both think that it would be easier to just leave him and the kids at home while I buzz into work, do my job, and then get back home in a timely manner. But week after week we show up… teeth brushed and hair combed, no less. Why do we do this to ourselves? Because it’s something that we believe in. It’s sacred.
2. Sacredness: Going to church is sacred. And not for the reason you might think. It’s not sacred because it has to do with God and Spirit and stuff like that (not entirely because of that anyway). No, going to church is sacred simply because nothing is sacred anymore. Doing things for the sake of tradition has, much like the notion of going to church, fallen to the wayside in today’s fast-paced world. Do any families still eat a homemade dinner together every night at 6 o’clock? Do kids still eat breakfast while watching Saturday morning cartoons in their p.j.s every weekend? Many families are keeping up such a fast pace all week long that Sunday has ironically become their only day of rest, and as such they won’t get up and dressed to attend church. So my family goes to church simply because it’s a time honored tradition. It is a time of spiritual rest and relaxation amongst a community of like-minded friends. And I want my kids to see that spiritual self-care is a priority – at least as important as the sports and meetings and classes and hobbies that we manage to find plenty of time for all week long.
3. Community: People interact with other people all the time – grocers and bankers and dry cleaners and teachers and co-workers. Yet, universally people share that they are lonely and lacking deeper connections in their lives. Churches provide instant community: most people are there for similar reasons and shared beliefs; there is usually a built-in time for community; the Sunday service provides talking points that lead to easy conversation. Those who actually attend church regularly know, first-hand, the amazing friendships that can be built within a faith community.
4. Inspiration: And last but not least, I attend Unity because I like what they stand for and the lessons that I learn there. It’s a one-hour reminder every week that I am sacred and divine. While it’s something that I technically know already, the weekly reminder inspires me to become ever more peaceful in all my interactions. And as a parent, more than ever, I benefit from that weekly inspiration!
So, in short, get your butt out of bed this Sunday and go to church!
First, though, I’ll explain that where we attend is technically not a church. Our board and leadership recently voted to officially change our description to “spiritual community” rather than church. This is part semantics (the new terminology better reflects who we are) and part marketing (probably due to the aforementioned resistance to anything church-y). But really, church, schmurch… every Sunday my husband, children and I go to a building where adults sit and listen to someone speak about matters of the spirit and children attend small groups where they do hands-on activities to help them explore matters of the spirit. Whatever you choose to call it, this is our reasoning for doing it:
1. Employment: It’s true… probably the number one reason that we find the motivation to get everyone in the family up and dressed and out the door on a Sunday morning is because it helps us pay the bills. I work at Unity on the North Shore, where we attend Sunday services. However, nowhere in my job description does it state that I am required to bring along a life partner, a toddler and a baby. Sure, bringing my kids to work might sound like a perk, but in reality it’s a struggle. I have to balance getting my work done with caring for my children. Mike really carries the parenting load for us on Sunday mornings, but while I’m running around setting up classrooms and answer questions, inevitably the baby will see me and cry to nurse, and the toddler will start screaming “mommy, mommy, look what I made.” Ignoring the kiddos would be cruel, so we’ve learned to get to Unity extra-early so that I can get my tasks completed and still have time to take mommy-breaks. And I multi-task: more than once I’ve made announcements from the pulpit while wearing a baby in a sling. A lot of weeks Mike and I both think that it would be easier to just leave him and the kids at home while I buzz into work, do my job, and then get back home in a timely manner. But week after week we show up… teeth brushed and hair combed, no less. Why do we do this to ourselves? Because it’s something that we believe in. It’s sacred.
2. Sacredness: Going to church is sacred. And not for the reason you might think. It’s not sacred because it has to do with God and Spirit and stuff like that (not entirely because of that anyway). No, going to church is sacred simply because nothing is sacred anymore. Doing things for the sake of tradition has, much like the notion of going to church, fallen to the wayside in today’s fast-paced world. Do any families still eat a homemade dinner together every night at 6 o’clock? Do kids still eat breakfast while watching Saturday morning cartoons in their p.j.s every weekend? Many families are keeping up such a fast pace all week long that Sunday has ironically become their only day of rest, and as such they won’t get up and dressed to attend church. So my family goes to church simply because it’s a time honored tradition. It is a time of spiritual rest and relaxation amongst a community of like-minded friends. And I want my kids to see that spiritual self-care is a priority – at least as important as the sports and meetings and classes and hobbies that we manage to find plenty of time for all week long.
3. Community: People interact with other people all the time – grocers and bankers and dry cleaners and teachers and co-workers. Yet, universally people share that they are lonely and lacking deeper connections in their lives. Churches provide instant community: most people are there for similar reasons and shared beliefs; there is usually a built-in time for community; the Sunday service provides talking points that lead to easy conversation. Those who actually attend church regularly know, first-hand, the amazing friendships that can be built within a faith community.
4. Inspiration: And last but not least, I attend Unity because I like what they stand for and the lessons that I learn there. It’s a one-hour reminder every week that I am sacred and divine. While it’s something that I technically know already, the weekly reminder inspires me to become ever more peaceful in all my interactions. And as a parent, more than ever, I benefit from that weekly inspiration!
So, in short, get your butt out of bed this Sunday and go to church!
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